THAT WAS THE 1990s - PART THREE  (1996 - 1998)

Star Trek - First Contact
*BEST OF THE YEAR*

The only way for Paramount to continue the lucrative Star Trek franchise - both on TV and on the big screen - by the late 1980s was to retire the now rapidly ageing old 1960s team of Spock, et al. The answer, The Next Generation, only started picking up during its second season on TV. 

The same applied to their big screen outing: after the lacklustre Star Trek - Generations, the movie franchise got a swift much-needed kick up its butt by the explosive Star Trek - First Contact. And how could First Contact, the 8^th movie in the series, fail? Combining strong villains with time travel (always a winner in the Trek franchise, witness Star Trek IV - The Voyage Home) it luckily didn't fall prey to the insipid political correctness of Star Trek - Voyager and the later Star Trek - Insurrection . . .

Lawnmower Man 2 - Beyond Cyberspace
*WORST OF THE YEAR*

A pastiche of 1990s sci-fi clichés, this unnecessary sequel seemed to the death knell for the cyberpunk movie genre. That is, until The Matrix showed what could be done . . .

The Arrival
(Paranoid thriller starring Charlie Sheen isn't too bad at all…)

Barbwire
(One of my favourite bad movies, Barbwire features two patently artificial reasons why one would want to see it - both of them by now removed by Pamela Lee Anderson . . .)

Chain Reaction
(Keanu Reeves outruns exploding fireball on offroad motorbike in bland The Fugitive rehash . . .)

Doctor Who
(Beloved British BBC sci-fi time traveller gets the Hollywood treatment with mixed results . . .)

Dragonheart
(CGI rendered dragon voiced by 007; heck! The dragon even looks like Sean Connery!)

Escape from L.A.
(Remake of Escape from New York, this time with Pulp Fiction inspired post-modern knowingness. Still fun though . . .)

Independence Day
*PROBABLY THE MOST POPULAR*
(Take the genre conventions of the disaster movie, steal the plot of War of the Worlds and V, add rumtitty-dum martial music, throw in some ethnic stereotypes and you have the summer's biggest hit movie.)

The Island of Dr Moreau
(Brando in freakish role that would later inspire similar character in TV's South Park . . .)

It Came From Outer Space II
(Remake old 1950s sci-fi classic, add obnoxious characters and you have a straight-to-video cheapie originally broadcast on the Sci-Fi Channel . . .)

Mars Attacks!
(Play Independence Day for laughs, add Tom Jones, several A-list actors who are unsure whether they're in a comedy or not and you have a mixed bag that flopped at the box office . . .)

Mystery Science Theatre 3000 - the Movie
("Did you fart?")

Screamers
(Adaptation of Philip K. Dick story makes for passable video fodder . . .)

Unforgettable
(Can't remember too much about this one . . .)

Within the Rock
(Straight-to-video cheapie originally broadcast on the Sci-Fi Channel that features stuntman in hot rubber suit . . .)

Contact
*BEST OF THE YEAR*

Okay, so the aliens turned out to be her goddamned father! But that doesn't make it "goddamn awful" as the teacher in South Park claims. Rather, this thoughtful adaptation of the Carl Sagan novel turned out to be the thinking man or woman's best celluloid science fiction effort of the year . . .

Starship Troopers
*NOTABLE*

Not exactly the thinking person's favourite - but a lot of fun. One such thinking person called it the most cynical movie she has ever seen, which may be true. However, who cares?

Batman & Robin
*WORST OF THE YEAR*

What we needed was some MORE dumbing down, an annoying Arnie, more homeroticism, garish production design, a meandering plot, unfunny one-liners, an extremely loud headache-inducing soundtrack.

Alien Resurrection
(Ripley gets intimate with gooey alien . . .)

Event Horizon
(The Shining. In space. In a spaceship.)

The Fifth Element
(Milla Jovovich. Wearing bandages. With orange hair. Yummy . . .)

Gattaca
(The only sensationalism you'll find in this understated tale about genetic engineering is the idea of a pianist with twelve fingers . . .)

Jurassic Park: The Lost World
(Dinosaurs having dinner. On exotic tropical island.)

Men In Black
*PROBABLY THE MOST POPULAR*
("…but I make this look good." And so he did.)

Mimic
(Giant cockroaches having dinner. In New York subway.)

The Postman
("You hand out hope like candy from your pockets, postman." Yeah, and diabetics beware!)

Star Wars Special Edition
(Cynical stunt to milk more money out of these movies - or genuine attempt to improve upon them? You decide . . .)

Dark City
*BEST OF THE YEAR*

Before The Matrix, there was . . . Dark City. However, instead of John Woo-inspired action we have German expressionist gloom and Dickian concerns by the director of The Crow. A more thoughtful concoction than Keanu Reeves going "whoa!"

Species II
*WORST OF THE YEAR*

Natasha Henstridge no doubt does not have a "no nudity" clause in her contract . . .

Armageddon
*PROBABLY THE MOST POPULAR*
(. . . and the noisiest. Like a venereal disease, this is also a gift that keeps on giving: I left the theatre with a splitting headache . . .)

Deep Impact
(The other asteroid about to hit earth movie . . .)

Godzilla
(Mutated reptile has dinner. In a rainy New York.)

Lost In Space
( . . . without a comprehensible plot.)

Soldier
(Rambo in space.)

Sphere
(Dustin Hoffman as action hero. Um, yeah . . .)

Star Trek - Insurrection
(Next Generation crew comes to the rescue of technophobic intergalactic hippies.)

The Truman Show
(Would you want to watch a show as dull as The Truman Show?)

X-Files
("One man alone cannot fight the future, Mr. Mulder . . .")

Agree? Disagree? Then contact me with your opinions or have it out on our discussion chatroom . . .

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